My father was an ordained protestant minister. I grew up in the church. I learned the liturgy and the litany. Had anyone asked me as recently as six months ago if I were a Christian I would have quickly said yes.
It occurs to me, however, that something is seriously wrong. Prayers go unanswered. The promise of grace and forgiveness are not evidenced in the church nor by church goers. Holy wars rage. And Christians seem as hell bent as other faiths to implement their beliefs world-wide.
And then the German Wings airliner crashed into a mountain in France. A co-pilot locked the captain out of the cockpit and intentionally drove the plane into the ground. 150 passengers and crew knew what was happening, knew they would die. They must have prayed furiously to be saved. And God let it happen. So, is the God of my fathers impotent, incompetent or just evil? If I had the power to save a life and did not I would be charged with negligent homicide. Is my God guilty of that crime. Is he able to snatch a plane from the air and set it safely on the ground? If not, then the miracles I have heard about are false. If so, then he is guilty. Can God be guilty? Does God have a plan that requires the random death of humans suddenly at the mercy of a madman? What kind of God is that? Can there be a God?
My search began much earlier, and I will carry some of those thoughts forward. Otherwise, my search continues.
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